Success so far!
So i tried somethings on the board.
I replaced the IRS2334 with a new one.
replaced the 10uF bulk with a 47uF.
replaced the bootstrap caps from 2.2uF to 1.0uF
replaced the gate resistors from 20 to 150ohm **lowest i had in lab*
***i replaced gate resistors after i tried the new driver and bulk cap, because it tripped, but in my haste i forgot to check for what it tripped,
and afterwards noticed it was undervoltage (had set lab supply to low) so doh. might have just been a bad driver, maby i should resolder the 20ohm gate resistors and try again.
but this seems to work! measured with fliir and nothing is abnormaly hot.
hottest parts are the bleeder resistors and the bypass relay.
worked without and with load.
oh and noticed a bug, forgot to " LED_MOTOR_SetLOW() after brakeing ^^ "
driving the motor and injection brakeing: