When the sensitivity list is more, the process/block is triggered more and hence the simulator has to do more work. But I've not noticed that slowdown in commercial simulators, how much slow down are you talking about? In any case, functionality is more important than just raw simulation with incorrect model.
Well, AFAIK that is an old-debate. I know for instance NC & VCS have both event and cycle driven engines underneath and they get invoked internally via heuristics. Don't know about other simulators on this aspect though.