Hi,
There are two ways to kill a relay contact.
1) high inrush current when closing the contact
2) high voltage when opening the contact with an inductive load
The first makes the contact to weld each other. They do not open any more.
The later makes the contacts to burn, to oxidize. Then the contact resistance increases until it can not close it anymore. Often this causes heating and if this situation lasts for a longer time, then the contacts may weld each other or the plastics will burn.
High current, high power relays have big, hard contacts, like beryllium, with high melting temperature.
Low current signal relays have soft contacts like gold. They don't oxidize and have low contact resistance.
To avoid killing by high current...either use a high inrush current rated relay (mind, that a capacitive load may cause inrush current in the hundreds Amperes region.), or install a soft start, or an inrush current limiter, maybe an NTC.
To avoid killing by inductive loads, install a voltage limiter. A snubber, a varistor, a free wheeling diode or similar.
Klaus